After the eighty-three year old lady finished her annual physical examination, the doctor said, “You are in fine shape for your age. But tell me, do you still have intercourse?”

“Just a minute, I’ll have to ask my husband,” she said. She stepped out into the crowded reception room and yelled out loud: “Henry, do we still have intercourse?”

And there was a hush…You could hear a pin drop.

He answered impatiently, “If I told you once, Margene, I told you a hundred times… What we have is…Blue Cross!”

An old man was sitting on a bench in the mall when a young man with spiked hair came over and sat down beside him. The boy’s hair was yellow, green, orange, and purple. He had black makeup around his eyes. The old man just stared at him.

Finally the boy said, “What’s the matter, old man, haven’t you ever done anything wild in your life?”

The old man thought for a while and answered, “Well yes actually, I have, I once got drunk and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son.”